Lots on my mind lately but most is just too personal for me to lay out in specifics here, even to be read by strangers.
I try to keep my eyes open to what the world around me is trying to tell me and one of the bigger doubts/concerns I have that sides with the argument of why I am "unqualified" to be an SMC keeps popping up. Enough where I've noticed it connecting in conversations, random TV shows, books/articles, etc. Enough where it's placing weight on my heart and that almost always translates to anxiety.
This is in theory going to be something that will affect how I choose to parent my child but in practice is probably not going to be much different than how my mom and dad parented me and how many people out there do as well. And it's a relatively minor thing that won't even be something I have to worry about for a good chunk of childhood.
But because my life experiences have put me where I am and where I probably still will be if the time ever comes that I do have a child on my own, it's a reality. It's something I need to be prepared for, just like one prepares for the conversations about "Where's my dad?" or "Where do babies come from?".
I'm sure this is just one of many excruciating things about parenthood that I'm only getting a glimpse of.