Sunday, January 3, 2016

New Year, Next Year

I love the change a new year brings. The idea of a fresh start and new perspective is something that I would imagine appeals to many people.

Because I'm a teacher, I get two weeks off for break. It is normally spent traveling to visit my dad or if I stay here, then ping-ponging back and forth to parties, gift exchanges, numerous lunches, dinners, movie nights, etc. These last two weeks have had just the right amount of family, friends, fun and relaxation.

I did some grown up stuff like buy a new water heater and replace my back door. Thanks to a very unexpected Christmas gift from my dad, I was able to do both and still have over $1200 to put into savings. Like most things in life, neither were an easy fix and ended up creating some additional problems that of course cost more money but it's done now and I feel much better knowing I don't have a back door that is rotting due to a bad install of a dog door and a water heater that is going to last me for the next 8-10 years.

Oddly enough, the water heater got me thinking. 8-10 years? I could have a kid the next time I have to shell out the money to replace this water heater.

And 2016? When the year made its switch all of a sudden my "in the somewhat distant future" plan became acknowledgable as next year. Next year I plan to start trying. Next year I could be pregnant. NEXT YEAR.

Something about that shift has lit a fire under me in really the only way I can do anything about right now.

Back story - In my late teens/early 20's I weighed almost 260 lbs. Woke up one morning during my junior year of college and just decided I was done with that. Lost almost 100 lbs by the time graduation rolled around. I've kept it off for almost 10 years now, happily fluctuating between 165-180. For my height I knew I needed to lose about 20-25 more and had I been in college a little longer I could have done that but my first year of teaching was stressful (to say the least) and I was lucky to get out having only gained 5 lbs. Schools are landmines for food. There is SO MUCH ALL THE TIME. Parents baking treats, sending in donuts, Starbucks. Front office catering bagels, donuts, lunch. PTA doing potlucks and cookie exchanges. It's so hard to always say no!

Anyway, I always knew that one of the things I wanted to do for myself before trying was lose the rest of the weight. Aside from the fact that any extra weight could have negative effects on my fertility, but I promised myself I would never get above 200 again. It's completely possible that at my current weight of 172 that I may not, but I don't want to risk it. But one of the biggest reasons I want to lose the rest of the weight is for the pregnancy itself. I never had a body I was proud of, even when I wasn't obese. I am proud of myself for losing weight but my body is still somewhat of a wreck because of it. Most of my leftover weight is in my stomach and my hips and I don't want anything standing in the way of me being proud of my pregnant body. I want to have that belly I can show off and take pics of. I don't want to spend any time hating a single moment or thing about pregnancy and given my current body, I know I would.

So after I made the discovery (can it be classified as a discovery for something so obvious?!) that next year is my year, I kicked myself back into weight loss mode. It has now been a week and I've started a yoga regimen to focus on toning and strengthening my core as well as cardio and I have started logging all my food. Down from 1800-2000 cals/day to 1400. It has been a while since I have actively tried to lose weight but I know my body can do it. I just hope my age/metabolism haven't changed things too much.

I have a good 18 months to lose 20-25 lbs. Even if I only lose 2 lbs a month I am still well over my goal. I hope to lose it a bit faster than that so I can enjoy being skinny for a bit. I've never been skinny before!

I've been reading blogs like a mad woman these last two weeks and have found a few that have been so inspiring to me! God bless this blogosphere and the things it does for everyone!


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